TWO

This may be news to some of you, but I thought I'd make it 'blog official.' We are in the process of attempting our first Frozen Embryo Transfer. It's always so weird to announce that we are trying to conceive. But... God has put SO MANY PEOPLE in my life that I have been able to offer support through their own journey of infertility. God has given us each a ministry/ministries and I believe this is one of mine. And in order to do so, it takes a level of openness that not all may be comfortable.

Frozen. Embryo. Transfer. It is exactly as it sounds. We will thaw and use an embryo/embryos from our first IVF, fresh cycle. It is half the money, have the drugs, half the pokes, have the ultrasounds... Definitely much easier than the first time around. We have completed two of the three necessary trips to Michigan, as we are using the same doctor. The next trip will be the BIG ONE. Transfer day.

It took a while to get to a point of peace about trying for another baby. I had a lot of fear about it. But I prayed that when the time is right, He'd put that peace in my heart. And He has. We are ready for whatever may come from this FET. We have five little 'snowflakes.' The statistic is that half will survive the thaw. Or none may survive the thaw. Or all may survive the thaw. We really have to just brace for anything. We will not do another fresh cycle at any point. If none survive, then we will accept that God chose Milo to be it for our biological family. Or maybe He has a couple more babies in store for our family. Yes we are opening ourselves up to some potential pain if things don't go as planned. It comes down to faith.

We should know whether or not the transfer was a success around the end of February. But I do ask that you not ask... We'll tell you when the time is right.

In the meantime, I have been obsessed with baby names. Oh my. So many lovely names to choose from. Do we go for another M name? Stick to a less popular name? Traditional? Popular? Vintage? French?

We have started talking to Milo a tad about Mommy having another baby. We ask if he wants mommy to have a girl baby or boy baby. It's always boy. What would we name a boy baby? Cookie. Hmmm. I don't think Cookie will make the top of our list, but Baby Cookies sure sounds like a cute nickname. =)

Speaking of talking, boy oh boy does Milo talk. He's consistently using 3-4 word sentences, singing, expressing his emotions... On our trip he'd randomly smile and say, "I'm happy." Oh it makes our hearts melt every time. OH AND... We have never told Milo to say, "I'm sorry." We have demonstrated it and spoke the words on his behalf. But we have never said, "Milo. Say I'm sorry" intentionally. Well... the other night at dinner, he threw food on the floor and it got on Nathan's pants. As we were going through the process of discipline, I said, "Daddy, I'm sorry Milo threw food on your pants." Milo paused, looked at Nathan, and said, "I sorry Daddy." Since then he has also said it to my Dad. Its just good to know that Milo is beginning to understand when and why we say I'm sorry without being forced. The same goes for sharing. We don't do forced sharing. We take turns. We help our friends find a toy they'd like, etc. Yet somehow, he is very generous, shares, and take turns.

I'm not trying to toot our own horn. We are SO far from being perfect parents. But we are really learning what Milo responds to and how to parent him. Milo is incredibly independent. Give him two choices and we are usually good to go. "Milo, do you want to walk out of the store, or do you want Mommy to carry you out of the store?" Both are acceptable choices to me in getting him to do what I need, and in most cases it spares us a tantrum.

OK. I think I've gone on long enough. Between the holidays, move, travels, etc. Its just been so long since I've sat down and had plenty of time to blog. Hopefully I'll get to blog again soon.

Please remember our family in your prayers as we hope to create a new life.

Story Time

We all have certain pressures in our life. Some imposed by our culture. Others imposed by our spouse or family. And many imposed by ourself.

I don't put a lot of pressure on myself which is good and bad. But as a mom, I think I have put some unnecessary pressure on myself, specifically library story time. I love story times. And I want Milo to love story times too. Library story times are what stay-at-home-moms do. Right?! Aren't we, as SAHMs supposed to do certain things?

I have decided to pass on library story times for the time being. I am removing that pressure. Milo is too young and too busy to sit for a structured story time. Some kids his age can handle it, not my kid. He was trying to escape. Climbing chairs. Opening bins, finding other things to do. Sure, it was all OK. He did participate in some of the time. But all in all, it just leaves me feeling like a failure for having the kid who can't sit still and its no fun for Milo to be scolded and told, "No Milo. Don't touch that. Don't do that. Don't go there..." So why go?!

I read to Milo. A lot. Milo loves books. So why do I feel pressure to take him to story time. No more. Well... at least for now. We'll try again in a few months. We'll still go to the library and find new books. This is also why the thought of homeschool is so appealing to me. I can tailor his education to what suits him best. Just sayin'.

January One

Hello friends.

Don't worry this is not a New Year's Resolution post. Instead it is a why 2012 should be great post.

We ended 2011 with a long awaited graduation. Nathan finished his last two courses, earning himself a degree in photojournalism from WKU! Woot Woot! And now, we are starting 2012 with a move back to Bowling Green, Kentucky. Our first move to BG back in 2005 was a total God thing. My advisor at Fairmont State told us about this great school her son was attending for pj. We were curious. One thing led to another and the next thing we knew we were loading up a moving truck. The first few months, like any other move, were tough. We missed our family. Badly. But thanks to a coworker at the time, Jo, we quickly made a great group of friends. These friends were instrumental in BG becoming home.

Then came our move to Michigan. While BG definitely became home, we knew we had to go where the job was. Looking back we see that Midland served us well. But in our hearts BG was still home. I prayed many times, "God. If Midland is supposed to be 'home' then make it so." But he never changed our hearts desire to be in BG.

Then came the move to Shelbyville. Shelbyville is a fine little town. We certainly enjoyed being near Louisville and Lexington, closer to our hometown in WV, and of course just two hours from my parents. We met some really. great. people. But we knew that BG was still the community we wanted to be long term, where we want to plant our roots and raise our kids.

{FYI: My parents moved from West Virginia to Bowling Green about six months after we left for Michigan. This, of course, made us long for BG even more.}

Over the next two weeks, we are moving back to Bowling Green. We. Are. Moving. Back. To. Bowling Green. Its still surreal. I don't know why God made BG so special to us, but it is. And the fact that we are moving back, again, is a God thing. We are still working out the details, trusting in God's provision. But we are so excited about getting back into this community. Making this our home. Using our talents to better this community.

For this reason, and so many more we know that 2012 is going to be really great. And maybe 2012 will bring us another little Morgan. Who knows?!

We signed a lease on a great, new apartment and will get our keys tomorrow. Sure, apartments have their issues, but we think it's going to be a great place. And Milo will be able to watch the trains from his play room. I normally wouldn't be thrilled about living near a train track, but once you are the mother of a toddler... suddenly its on the pro list. We hope to stay in this place until we decide to buy a house.

I hope you each have great hopes about all that God will be doing in your life in 2012. The church sermon on Sunday was about not looking to start the year by fixing your faults, but focusing on using your talents in great ways. Let's do that!

Happy New Year!