Worth It

While nursing is proving to be quite the challenge, our nights have been going quite well. Since I have been pumping to let myself heal, Mom, Nathan, and I were all able to take a feeding. I still had to get up each time to pump, but it was better than getting up to feed him, then still have to pump. Once I can get back to regular nursing without the shield getting up three or four times will be a piece of cake.

I have had a few women share their difficult nursing experiences with me, and I really appreciate it. It helps knowing that I am not the only person who is or has struggled with nursing. I know we will overcome these challenges. Its definitely just frustrating. But Milo is worth ever hurdle from IVF, a traumatic labor, and nursing problems... I will take it all for my son.

I think I also have a touch of the Baby Blues. Definitely not Postpartum Depression level, but just very emotionally fragile. I don't feel ready for visitors and even phone calls are difficult. I'm just grateful for my parents and Nathan. They have been very supportive and encouraging. Dad is going back to BG, but Mom is going to stay for one more week. I wish I didn't need her to stay, but I do. She has been taking care of me, so that I can focus on taking care of Milo.

Having a baby has definitely been humbling. I have always been pretty independent. From the help I needed in the hospital to the help I need now at home... I've learned that asking and taking help is not a sign of weakness. Its a sign of survival. I know that for Milo's sake, I need to get and accept help when I need it.

And on a lighter note... we are seeing early signs of Nathan's personality coming out in Milo. No one likes a dirty butt, but Milo gets VERY unhappy when he is dirty. The minute we take off the dirty diaper he stops crying and happily allows us to clean him. I've never seen a baby enjoy having their diaper changed more than Milo. I'm thinking Milo may end up having Nathan's cleaning genes. I'm definitely not going to complain. :)