Sleep

{After Milo's first Halloween party with our newborn group... he immediately passed out on the way home. And notice he is not in an infant car seat anymore. Our little-big boy made it clear he was ready for a little-big boy car seat... which he loves.}

A big theme in our lives right now... as well as the lives of most other new parents... is sleep. I think I've mentioned it before, like a million times before. Nathan and I were talking this evening. In our conversation, Nathan made the comment that we are just in transition. I followed that up with the fact that we've been working on this transition since Milo was 7 weeks old! I don't think we can still call it a transition. Maybe we can.

Anyway. This evening I did a little more reading about attachment parenting. For the most part, that describes us. I breast feed on demand, baby wear, etc. This is partly because this is what we chose, but I think an equal part of that is because it fit Milo's needs. Not all baby's like to be snuggled or worn. Milo does.

I have this battle (one of many) going on in my head. Society vs. Instinct. My instinct tells me that Milo needs me close. But society says that by 3 months your baby should be sleeping in their bed and through the night. But what if that doesn't fit our baby. Does that mean I should attempt to force Milo into something he may not be ready for yet? I want Milo to be an independent sleeper, but I think he has made it clear he is simply not ready for that yet.

And there are many benefits to co-sleeping, sleep sharing, or the family bed... whichever you terminology you prefer. My favorite are the emotional benefits. There ares studies that show that babies who co slept with their parents grow up with a higher self-esteem, less anxiety, actually become independent sooner, are better behaved in school, and are more comfortable with affection. Good benefits of co-sleeping. You'll see.

This past weekend, Nathan heard an episode of This American Life about love. Apparently back in the day (maybe 50-60 years ago) all of the physicians and professionals in the field were stating that a baby who is kissed more than once a year is an over kissed baby. The story was about one scientist who was fought that notion. That just kind of proves that what "they" say should be taken somewhat lightly.

And there may be some of you out there who think I'm making a mistake. But we all know that every baby is different and has different needs. Many of the authors on the subject admit that they didn't understand until their third or fourth child came along and made them understand.

I'm going to try to focus on meeting Milo's needs and that's it. Its obvious he is not ready for independent sleeping and that's OK. I will still try to encourage it, especially for day time napping. But I am going to take the pressure off and follow his lead.

And if I can be honest about one more thing... As the mother of a baby boy who is growing way too fast (he's in 6-12 month clothing already!!) I'm glad he still likes to be cuddled and snuggled and nursed.